Archive for June, 2011

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Ponderous

06/30/2011

Been a while since I wrote anything here. I suppose I just haven’t been able to collect and organize my thoughts into a post-worthy jumble of language and grammar.

The past several weeks have been exhausting, both on an emotional level and a physical one. On the good side of things, my 3rd anniversary with MB was this past Tuesday and we celebrated by having a wonderful meal at Restaurant Sabor in Timonium. MB got a smoked salmon spring roll appetizer and homemade gnocchi with steak for dinner. I had the chef’s roasted red pepper bisque, a smoked salmon salad plate and a bison bolognese pasta dish. All were delicious. We brought our favorite Riesling, Relax from Germany, and lushly enjoyed almost 2 whole bottles.

This weekend we are heading down to the beach for the long weekend. I have taken an extra two days off after the 4th to extend our stay and we are both looking forward to the relaxation. It will be Eric’s first trip to the beach so we are really looking forward to seeing how much fun he has.

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A lot of different themes have been running through my head lately: respect, faith, friendship, pessimism and hope.

I’ve been fighting with a lack of respect in different areas of my life and I’m struggling to understand how to respond to it. I often take it internally and hold back a response, just because in the situations in which I find myself, I don’t feel a response would garner any sort of realization or change in the other people involved. Futility is not something I welcome, so I tend to remove myself from the situation as soon as possible.

Along with respect, I have found myself wondering where in the scheme of friendship I stand with several people. Sometimes I feel as though I really am a valued friend and other times it’s as if I’m only thought of in cursory glances, with a fleeting mental mark left that I exist. I have also found that there are perceptions of me that are so wildly different from anything I could anticipate that I don’t even know if I can understand how I am viewed by others anymore. It all contributes to this confusion that I can’t seem to escape. I suppose all the thoughts that have been swirling in my mind loop and knot over themselves so they all become an intertwined jumble of conscious chaos. I’m not sure where I stand outside of my own house anymore and I think it has me feeling like I don’t have a place. I know where I am in my home, with my family and those I love, but when I leave those walls I feel I fall away and become less of a person, less of someone who has value to the world.

I suppose that is a struggle I’ve had for much of my life, though I kind of thought by now I’d have it figured out.

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And so I sit…

06/09/2011

I’m sitting in the La-Z-Boy while MB paints. I’ve added a bunch of music to my Library, which now totals 22,007 songs, and have been listening to the new In Flames album, Sounds of a Playground Fading for the past little while. I like the album; it’s a little more melodic and atmospheric than their previous releases and I think it suits them. It is definitely a far cry from the brutality that was Colony or Whoracle, though.

Now, as I type, I’ve switched to the latest from God is an Astronaut. If you haven’t listened to them and are into instrumental post-rock, I highly recommend them. Any and all of their albums are fantastic.

This week has felt rather surreal, with ups and downs. The heat wave that snuck its way in has made being outside rather unbearable. Oh, and by snuck in, I meant smashed through the wall screaming “Oh Yeah!” Internet issues continue to abound at work; I’ve had to repatch everything back to the way it was last week. It is rather infuriating. And to make matters worse, the fax line died this afternoon. I guess I’ll be on the phone with Verizon support tomorrow.

I would like to post some photos of the 92Q vehicle wrap I designed that was completed last week, but I forgot to bring the finished photographs home. If I can, I will post one or two here tomorrow. I have another wrap in the works now, for Elite Lock & Key. It will likely not be wrapped until the week after next, though.

The upcoming weekends look to be increasingly busy, with appointments, parties and such to go to. MB, Eric, Cody and I are planning to head to the beach for the 4th. I hope to take a few extra days off after the holiday to be able to stay at Bethany for longer than just the weekend. It’ll be nice to be there when they set off the fireworks on the beach.

I’m somewhat struggling for words at the moment, so I believe I’ll wrap it up here.

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Penny Wise, Pound Foolish

06/02/2011

So where to begin….

I got back into work Tuesday, somewhat fearing the shitstorm that might have been waiting for me since I took last Friday off. While I didn’t really have a ton of things waiting for me, I came in to realize that the internet, not-so-ably provided by Clearwire, was horrific. Our downstream and upstream numbers were hovering below what I used to experience with dial-up ages ago. Thanks to the deplorable upstream numbers of .02 Mbps, Our VoIP OfficeSuite phone system was basically nonfunctional. We could not answer phones, access voicemail or even log into the phone system to change it to alert incoming calls of our technical difficulties. While on the phone with Clearwire tech (non)support for 3 hours, we tested every browser on every machine on every operating system in the building at for Speedtest.net results, most of the time being totally unable to even reach the site, let alone run the test. The people on the phone didn’t seem to grasp the concept that the browser, cache properties or specific computer we were using had nothing to do with the fact that the bandwidth was unacceptable and no browser test would rectify our phone system. After finally getting to a level 2 technician, the end result was that there was obviously a problem with the local tower and they would have to put a ticket in for it to be checked. Meanwhile, we would have to deal with the horrid internet access until they somehow managed to figure it out and fix it. GREAT!

3 days later and it’s still deplorable. However, thanks to a little ingenuity on my part (pats self on back), I was able to patch our network to share our colleague’s DSL connection (even longer story, we can’t get DSL, FiOS or Comcast…..yet). That allowed us to have a fully functional internet connection and, even more importantly, functional phones. I cannot emphasize enough how much CLEARWIRE SUCKS!

I am reminded of a quote by a famous man, repeated quite often by a colleague of mine: “The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten.”  -Ben Franklin

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